What do Men Want in a Wife? February 27, 2007
Posted by WishBoNe in Emotions & Feelings, Family, Health and Fitness, Random Thoughts, Relationships, Romance/ Love.trackback
Ladies, ever asked yourself what men really want in a wife? Do they want a wife who is able to cook, clean the house, look after the kids, pay the household bills in equal amount, and still satisfy the husbands’ needs?
What do these men take us for? How can they say we’re demanding and yet, they still demand all those emotional and monetary needs? Outrageous! There’s only 24 hours in a day. Minus the 8 hours at work, you have 16 hours. Minus the 7 hours of sleep, you have 9 hours left. Minus the 4 hours of cleaning the house, you have 5 hours left. Minus the 2 hours of coaxing the kids to sleep, you have 3 hours left. So, does that mean the husband wants to be satisfied?
If men can say that they’re tired after a hard day’s work, don’t tell me women have super human strength like the Duracell bunny. Everyone is tired after working 8 hours. Even those on shift are tired after 12 hours of work.
Unless the man is rich like Bill Gates, as a woman, I won’t mind not working and do all those ancient activities like cleaning the house, washing the clothes, cooking and sewing. However, life like that would be boring. I would want to take up lessons such as a third language and travelling too.
So, men, what do you really look for in a wife?
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Time have changed the roles of woman. They are no longer the home maker anymore. Just because woman can contribute to the monthly expense, it doesn’t mean that they can forget about their duty as a wife.
How many households in SG actually have maids? Actually do we need them to be around to take over the duties of a wife? Why are they here in the first place? Because the woman can’t perform the duties of a wife anymore.
Being tired at the end of the day is hardly a good excuse for not knowing how to cook, skipping house work and having kids. If the wife can accept a smaller flat, a smaller allowance, a lower living standard does she still need to work for extra income?
nothing – just companionship. we begin our journey into this world alone, and we will most likely end our journey in this world alone. so in between that start and end point, wouldnt it be nice to share the remaining road with a soul partner for a change?
Women should not do what they don’t like. Just because some men have certain expectations of women does not mean women have to succumb to those expectations. I know women that in some cultures (at least in India) do not have a choice because it’s usually the girls’ family that decides who she marries. In which case, I wouldn’t put the blame squarely on men. It’s society as a whole that needs to change. The societies we live in need to evolve a culture where men and women are free to make their own choices in the world.
The idea of a “man” and a “woman” are stereotypes that have evolved over the ages. Perhaps we are applying gender rules that are archaic – rules that do not apply in a world that is dramatically different today. But cultures and the stereotypes they dispense do not change over night. It will take time. Perhaps in the future it will be men cooking and cleaning and women bringing home the dough. Perhaps it will be women who will whistle at men on the streets, pinch their bottoms and insinuate men into bed. I’m sure many men wouldn’t mind cleaning the floor or washing clothes for sex!
@杰
Times have changed indeed. However, the society still differentiates between gender even though there’s supposed to be “equality”. Such a word has too often be used by us to emphasize on our needs and wants. It might have been abused to such an extent that wifes still have to do the same things such as clean the house, cook, care for the kids without expecting the husband to do anything. She still has to work because our living standards have risen to such levels that a smaller flat costs the same as a 4 room-flat 10 years ago.
I’m not saying that women should leave all the cooking to the maid. It’s just that if the husband helps to lighten the workload by helping to clean the house, women do know how to make their men feel appreciated, by feeding them. By insisting that a wife must know how to cook and still refuse to help with the cleaning, she would be upset because her man doesn’t understand at all. She would not do anything on her own free will.
@me
Soul partner, huh? It would seem too romantic in this society but it should be possible.
@Prasant
Gosh, I like it when you said “Women should not do what they don’t like. Just because some men have certain expectations of women does not mean women have to succumb to those expectations.”
Maybe what you’re trying to mean is that since men have the choice of not doing what they don’t like, women should have the right too. Society has revolved such that if both the women and men have to work in order to provide for the family, cooking and cleaning doesn’t have to be just the wife’s role. Although it’s difficult to balance between cooking and cleaning, it is to be noted that if a man expects his wife to do something, he should do something because she would expect him to do something too.
Prasant, to my mind, must be right. One day we will all pay the bills equally, do household chores in equal quantities (of course, bearing in mind the physical limitations of the female gender), and have truly quid pro quo sort of relationships.
Until that day, however, there is the gap between theory and practice. It is this gap that makes people (like yourself) think that men want a working wife AND a housewife – i.e. they want both roles to be fulfilled by their spouse.
I doubt this to be the general case, however. Men who want working wives will get a maid, and men who want housewives will pay all the bills. It will be some cheek for men to expect otherwise.
We are all of us confused over our gender roles because of the emancipation of women, but soon (one hopes) the new paradigm will become the norm and we will all have socially-justified expectations once again.
@thegreatsze
There may be men who want both a working wife AND housewife. It could be due to the traditional culture that is still strong somewhere and the family values being passed down.
The long fight to allow women to work and earn the same amount for the same position did not go to waste. However, some aspects may have been neglected or not foreseen in the plan to gain the freedom to be included in the corporate ladder; our social values.
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